Film Review: Feast (2005)

SYNOPSIS:

On a lonely desert road in the middle of nowhere hard-drinking patrons of a country-fried dive bar must stand together as they are forced to fight for their lives against a vicious family of blood-crazed monsters in this fast and frenzied throwback to the age of B-Horror greatness. Starring Balthazar Getty, Judah Friedlander, Henry Rollins, and Clu Gulager.

REVIEW:

This is an hour and a half of tongue-in-cheek horror wrapped in nostalgic genre scenarios, deep fried in gut-wrenching camp value and served with an homage-to-the-classics dipping sauce. Yes, I liked it a lot and no, I am not wearing pants.

Feast is a sepia-toned, dirty bloodbath packed with an unbelievable amount of bad taste. The cinematography was so frantically chaotic that I felt like the constant and bloody violence wasn’t the only thing that kept me on edge(aroused). This movie reeked of vintage, gritty horror and western blood oozed from its veins. Horrible freeze-frame character introductions only added to the charm of this guiltiest of all pleasures. It seemed like no one was safe, nothing was sacred and anything could happen at any moment.

When a group of lowlife locals gather in the dingiest bar ever established they end up having to fight for more than their self-respect. It seems that from the silent desert night has come a family of horrible beasts that will kill in any way that involves gallons upon gallons of blood drenching the imbibing protagonists. This is a dirty and dusty western set to the tune of the goriest monster carnage I have seen since… well, this movie may in fact be at the top of that list. As the story evolves we begin to notice that although all characters involved have pretty much spent their entire life drunk and angry together, they don’t really know who they can trust and who would make the best bait. We see some pretty upsetting decisions go down as well as the gruesome chuckle-worthy aftermaths. I laughed quite a bit at the gory deaths of some of the innocent barstool jockeys and yes, I am a calloused son of a bitch.

I particularly like it when a horror movie can succeed in scaring the characters in the story without having to resort to cheap jump-out scenes to try and scare me (I always scream). This is a no-bullsh*t monster movie that doesn’t try to hide the violence for psychological suspense, either. You do view the entire movie from the barflies’ point of view but the flick is anything but cheap on creature shots. One scenario in particular (involving a rapidly decaying, maggot infested face) almost kept me from keeping down the entire bottle of Charles Shaw Chardonnay I had just pounded (because I’m classy, ladies). I loved the desperation on said character’s hideous face throughout the torturous scenes and not only was willing to accept that these poor souls were most likely going to be shredded into a crimson pulp, but I was looking forward to it.

John Gulager obviously knows how to get the entire bang for his buck considering this movie was made for just slightly over one million bucks. Feast unleashed more ass-kickery than most big budgeted horror films I have seen in a long time. The only thing that made it feel like it was without infinite monetary backing was the fact that most of the movie took place inside the bar. Despite the budgetary constraints, every over-the-top scene will satisfy even the most blood hungry gore lover in you. Gulager delivers visions of monster sex/birth, out-of-the-blue amputation, a plethora of disembowelments, decapitations galore, and even a few curse words. This movie has no identity crisis, it shows you exactly what it is and it is not bashful.

I am happy to say that this flick stands proudly in my movie collection and I must mention that I also loved the much-deserved sequel. One can only hope that Feast III hits shelves with the same disgusting spirit. It seems like it has been far too long since we were given the chance to appreciate good, ol’ fashioned, grisly monster horror and I am very grateful that Feast has been brought to the table.

Bon appetit

Feast (2005)

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