Film Review: Attack of the Adult Babies (2017)

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SYNOPSIS:

Three family members break into a remote country house to recover secret documents, but discover a cult of wealthy adults dressed as babies inside with sexy “nurses” as their caretakers.

REVIEW:

“Attack of the Adult Babies” sounds like a title that would get tossed around in a cheesy 70s porno about the adult film industry. It reeks of goofiness. You can’t take it seriously.

Basically, the film really couldn’t have a better title, although it goes under “Adult Babies” as well. You simply cannot take anything in the film at face value. That fact is actually a saving grace in some ways. This film is one of the oddest things I have seen, and that is stacking it against “Forbidden Zone”, “Thundercrack!”, and “Hillbillys in a Haunted House” (the actual spelling, folks, not my mistake).

Just so there is no confusion about the title, the film opens to endless tracking shots through a rather ornate manor before showing us a curvy woman in a PVC nurse outfit scampering away from an old fat man wearing an oversized cloth diaper and swinging a nursing bottle big enough for cattle. Now, hold that thought.

The film plops you in the middle of a rather bland family playing a rather bland board game in a rather bland living room. It’s actually quite jarring. Get used to that feeling.

As the family’s calm devolves into an argument about the son wanking in his stepsister’s underwear, two Russian men with guns burst in and take the family hostage. Remember what I said about jarring?

They send the mother, daughter, and stepson to retrieve some documents from a building. Unfortunately, that building is the manor where we are shown women, all in PVC nurse outfits, being instructed on how to care for their wards, grown men in nappies who must be treated as if they are infants at all times. The group of nurses are under the control of the head nurse whose clothes brings to mind Gestapo outfits and her manner is just as dark and harsh.

So far, it sounds like Troma might have their hands in this, but, trust me, Troma wishes it could create something this insane, yet well focused.

To give you much more of the story would be wrong. Not because there is some gimmick twist that the whole thing hangs on. “Attack of the Adult Babies” is a movie that should be experienced with as little foreknowledge as possible simply so that each bizarre and utterly twisted event hits you out of the blue as intended. I avoided reading any reviews until after I watched the film, and I’m glad I did. It has been ages since I have seen a movie that literally had me reacting out loud to sudden changes, graphic set pieces, and some of the most disgusting uses of bodily functions since “Two Girls, One Cup”.

Given some of what I have said might have you thinking that the film is an endurance test of gruesomeness and grossness. It can be if you have a weak constitution, but, believe it or not, the film is a damn funny comedy. Yes, it has that rather dry British humor that some Americans just don’t jive with, but the scatological humor and the large amounts of blood should make it grounded enough for those with a baser sense of humor. Think Peter Jackson’s “Dead Alive” but with most of the blood replaced by poo.

Now you are starting to understand why this isn’t for just everyone.

That being said, the film does utilize simpler techniques like running jokes as well as a couple of slow burn jokes. A great early example comes during the home invasion: The criminals order everyone face down on the floor. Then they order the father to stand. Much like the “Family Guy” skit with Peter’s hurt knee, the father has difficulty rising from the floor. As the scene continues, the reactions of the gunmen and the other family members make it an early gem. Plus, being a bit older myself, I understand how uncomfortable getting up from a prone position can be which added to the humor.

The performances are all good, with some people chewing the scenery with absolute abandon and making the film better for it. Subtlety is not a virtue on exhibit in “Attack of the Adult Babies”. I mean, you have Laurence R. Harvey from “Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)” as one of the adult babies in all of his pussel-gutted glory. If that doesn’t put you off, then how about explosive defecation or projectile vomiting of blood? Yup, you get that as well.

Does this vile soup of grossness have a point? Actually, yes. There is a reason for everything that film presents, and it ties into a conspiracy that might have more than just a global reach. Again, it’s better to discover the purpose behind everything on your own. Knowing what it is shouldn’t affect your enjoyment, but it feels so satisfying to learn the truth after all the insanity thrown at you.

The film is not perfect. There are a few sections that seem to stretch longer than they should, and the humor sometimes falls flat, though some of that could just be cultural differences. Honestly, there is enough shocking weirdness in this film that the few failings it has can be mostly overlooked. Still, I have to wonder what it could have been like with a larger budget and a slightly tighter script.

If you are not freaked out by half-naked old fat men or offended by copious amounts of feces, you should give “Attack of the Adult Babies” a spin. Personally, I can’t wait to show this to a few people I know just to see their stunned expressions.