Film Review: Troll 2 (1990)

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SYNOPSIS:

Young Jonathan is shocked to find that the bedtime stories he was told by his deceased grandfather, the infamous GRAMPA SETH, of evil GOBLINS who turn people into living vegetables in order to eat them, is about to come to terrifying reality on a family trip to the town of NILBOG. With the assistance of the Troll master, CREEDENCE LEONORE GIELGUD, the Trolls wish to feed Jonathan’s family evil food.

REVIEW: 

“You don’t piss on hospitality”

“Tightening my belt one loop so that I don’t feel hunger pains, …

“It would be a shame! The blood would mix with the meat, and we’d have to leave it in vinegar for the whole night! ”

Who’d of thought that a film so bad would draw such an interest that it single handedly formed a cult following on that basis alone. Even now at present a documentary of the making of this film is rounding circuits with critical acclaim. Yes, voted as” the best worst movie” ever, it has to be Troll 2. I was tempted to place this in our cult film section, though I still thought it was closer to a horror entry.

So although I admit to never really bothering with any offerings from the series I had to investigate this one for myself. I mean, c’mon – I receive several films a week that are pretty bad…so what makes this one any special? Let’s see… bad acting, check….poor special FX…check, crappy script….check…. lousy premise…check… shall I go on? Of course!

What makes this sh*tty film such a little gem is that it’s so bad it’s painful to watch at times. In turn making a donut out of a turd. The acting …you’d swear at times is being read off of cue cards and being presented for the first time. The acting especially from the teens in the film is so forced, so phony and so dramatically off balance….you quickly get a case of … ya, people don’t really talk that way do they? …..ya, that sounded a little gay without out being really gay.

How about the bleeding green goo scenes? Pour bucket of food color water on head and shoot! now that’s a keeper right there.

Ok, so somewhere in there is a story, not a good one…but still the same a story. Young Joshua (Michael Stephenson) Waits is having delusions of his grandfather appearing to tell bedtime stories about evil goblins who live in the forest. They have a special knack for turning others into vegetables so that they can eat them.

The goblins are pretty thrift store Halloween mask looking with outfits that seem more like taken from a theme park than a proper practical effect outfit setup. In fact, I was instantly taken back to muppets days though maybe on a lesser level. The family decides that an outing is overdue and sets out to a town called NILBOG (that’s goblin spelled backwards). Along for the ride are Michael Waits, Diana Waits and Holly Waits. Their family interaction is so painfully scripted that you almost feel the tension in the script the moment they begin speaking. Anyone for a travel song? How about “Row the boat”? ……. ya if you ever wanted to shoot yourself in the head, this would be that time. But moving along……

The acting performance in this film is just really mismatched. Margo Prey who plays the role of Diana Waits just simply can’t act to save herself. Half the time, dazed, eyes glazed over with that distant stare connected to forced scripted lines just doesn’t work.
The town of Nilbog, is essentially a feeding ground for goblins. They take on the disguise of humans to trick them into drinking or eating some of their green potion which turns the humans into vegetables. Once in this state they can consume the plantlike result until the next victim comes along. In the forest lives their queen who takes the form of a sickly human with bad teeth. She lures young children to the house where she can transform them as well. The role of Creedence Leonore Gielgud, the goblin queen is played by Deborah Reed who actually reveals herself to be quite attractive in transformation scene.

Troll 2 skips around alot with several situations that feel more connect the dots than anything. In the mean time Joshua converses with his dead grandpa who seems to hold all the answers from within the boundaries of a mirror. Some of the editing reminded me more of Sid and Marty Krofft style at times combined with equally bad scoring. All this together combined with really bad costuming makes for an interesting mix of slop. Though what I got out of it provided more humor than intended. I think all of this and some really bad script lines is what makes this film so appealing……so bad its good. I think when all is said and done, if you actually go into this film with that kind of expectation you will really enjoy it. It put a smile on my face more than once, which is more than I can say for alto of films.

Troll 2 was filmed in 1990 under the direction of Claudio Fragasso (or pseudonym Drake Floyd.) The film was brought under the Troll 2 franchise even though nothing in the film has to do with Trolls. (they mention goblins throughout the script) I believe this is another case of studio swap to meet franchise titles magic that we have suffered thru time and time again. The film also has nothing in common with the first movie which gained a bit of horror genre interest. Reports go on to mention that the film crew only spoke Italian and that the director insisted on the lines being spoke verbatim.