Author Archives: Kirk13

Top 10 Goriest Horror Movie Death Scenes

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The 13 Goriest Horror Movie Death Scenes Howdy. I think everyone can agree that violence is awesome. It is something we are taught to appreciate since day one. There is nothing more culturally sophisticated than a nice, well done vision of sadistic, relentless, bloody violence. I’ve noticed that in all walks of life horrific bloodbaths have entertained, inspired, consoled and comforted so many people. There really is no substitute for finding that special someone, curling … Continue reading

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The 13 Coolest, Most Badass Bad Guys in Horror Movie History

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So, in my mind, amongst horrible and bloody thoughts of you, I have a growing mass of villains and horror icons that I both love and admire and yet, have never really seen any such compilation from any other esteemed and notable columnist that wasn’t the same old regurgitated sh*t being used over and used over for the sake of churning out another mediocre horror-themed article. It occurred to me while drunk and sharpening axes, … Continue reading

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Top 15 Worst Horror Franchise Follow ups after Horror Classics

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Yes, you have voiced your opinion over and over about how remakes and sequels should shut the hell up and you could make the best horror movie ever if you only had the budget that was wasted on these current, needless continuations and resurrections, right? Well, you smug little asshole, every sequel or remake has been based upon impressions of what the target audience wants to see these days as a mass. These companies put … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Uninvited (2009)

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SYNOPSIS: The Uninvited tells the tale of former loony-bin inhabitant Anna, who is just being released from an institution after the fiery death of her nightmare-inducing, sickly mother. While happy to be back with her sister, she is very wary of her father’s new girlfriend, Rachael, a (super attractive) nurse who took care of her mother up until the explosiony accident, and is now living in her freakishly peaceful house as her step-mom-to-be. Rachael seems … Continue reading

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Film Review: Slither (2006)

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SYNOPSIS: In a southern Mayberrian hunting town a meteorite crashes and a small, cephalopodan parasite begins to wreak havoc. When the infected townsfolk start turning into zombie-like alien hybrids by means of crazy death-worms, the world’s only hope rests in the hands of the do-good, love struck sheriff. This is a blood-soaked battle to save mankind and it is packed with schlock sci-fi/horror fun. Starring Nathan Fillion, Michael Rooker and Elizabeth Banks. REVIEW: This flick … Continue reading

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Top 13 Best / Worst Horror Movies based on Books

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Books are magical. Immersing yourself in the depths of the written word can whisk you away to the far reaches of imagination and drag you naked through the intricacies of epic tales of love, adventure, romance and horror. Unfortunately, the way I see it, books take a lot of time away from the more important enjoyments in life like drunkenly and maniacally weilding a chainsaw just to f*ck some sh*te up. I have also found … Continue reading

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Film Review: Feast (2005)

Feast (2005)

SYNOPSIS: On a lonely desert road in the middle of nowhere hard-drinking patrons of a country-fried dive bar must stand together as they are forced to fight for their lives against a vicious family of blood-crazed monsters in this fast and frenzied throwback to the age of B-Horror greatness. Starring Balthazar Getty, Judah Friedlander, Henry Rollins, and Clu Gulager. REVIEW: This is an hour and a half of tongue-in-cheek horror wrapped in nostalgic genre scenarios, … Continue reading

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