Movie Review: Vampire Time Travelers

Vampire Time Travelers Movie Review by Matt Boiselle 

Many thanks to the good souls over at MVD Entertainment for sending this one over – when I opened up the mail package to reveal the Blu-ray cover, I was a little taken aback at the cover art (hence why I used an alternate picture) – nothing head-exploding graphic, but possibly something that would offend someone at some point, and that’s just not worth the effort to defuse.
In any event, the film is the 1998 straight-to-video “Vampire Time-Travelers”, and it’s very safe to day that this one is sure to attract a niche-audience, for sure.

The movie uses oddity as an anchor, and that’s a good thing as if this movie were left to its already airy devices it would surely float away into the big blue sky above. Focusing on a female vampire who is on a world tour of revenge for what happened to her sister at the hands of some sorority sisters, her sharpened fangs just aren’t what they used to be, so she opts for alternative bite-spot…directly on the tuchus. The viewer is then treated to an onslaught of flashbacks and dream-sequences, and unfortunately none of them assist with the progression of the storyline, to be honest. If it weren’t for the admirable job of polishing up the late-90’s production, there wouldn’t be much to crow about here – the acting is a full-blown step under sub-par, the humor is as flat as a prison-house pancake, and I didn’t happen to see one instance of time-traveling in the entire movie…all 65 minutes of it.

Try and make sense of this movie, if you can – it should definitely have your gray matter in overtime mode, especially when the movie goes through a stretch of editing that frankly gives off the vibes as if it was done under the influence of 8-10 high-caffeine energy drinks and a crippling bout of ADHD. “Vampire Time-Travelers” is a special film to be witnessed, that I simply cannot lie about – you’ll more than likely remember this one until your dying days. If you are interested in seeing this presentation in all its new found Blu-ray glory, combined with a monstrously proportioned side order of special features (listed below), then hop on over to MVDShop.com and grab one now – pre-orders open for an April 21st release date.

Special Features Include:

New director-approved SD master from original tape elements.
Commentary with director Les Sekely
Director Les Sekely interview
Actress JJ Rodgers interview
Actress Angelia Scott interview
Director of Photography Dennis Devine and Assistant Director Steve Jarvis interview
Short Film: Not So Grim Reaper
Vampire Time Travelers – Visual Vengeance Trailer
Bonus Movie: I Know What You Did In English Class (2000)
‘English Class’ Commentary with director Les Sekely
Director Les Sekely ‘English Class’ interview
‘English Class’ Cinematographer Russ Lindsay Interview
‘English Class’ Director of Photography Dennis Devine and Production Assistant Steve Jarvis interview
‘English Class’ Actor Russell Towne interview
I Know What You Did in English Class – Visual Vengeance Trailer
Visual Vengeance trailers
‘Stick Your Own’ VHS sticker set
Reversible sleeve featuring new ‘I Know What You Did In English Class’ art
Folded mini-poster
Optional English subtitles