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Film Reviews

Film Review: The Thingy: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: It’s the placenta coming of age story the world’s been waiting for. As Luke the Placenta enters his teenage years, he tries desperately to connect with those around him, only to be met with indifference, confusion, and cruelty. And the sweet taste of oral fixation. REVIEW: Love, like all intangibles, is an enigma. The only way it can be …

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Film Review: Beacon Point (2016)

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SYNOPSIS: A group of hikers lost on the Appalachian Trail stumble across an ancient secret that threatens their survival. REVIEW: Beacon Point throws a bunch of people into the wilderness, adds some Native American myth making, a pinch of aliens and slathers it all in superfluous storylines and exposition. Written and directed by Eric Blue, making his feature length debut, …

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Film Review: Session 9 (2001)

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  SYNOPSIS: Session 9 is a contemporary tale of terror set in an abandoned insane asylum. The residents on Danvers, Massachusetts steer well clear of the place. But Danvers State Mental Hospital, closed down for 15 years, is about to receive five new visitors. REVIEW: Session 9 is one of those movies people rent because it’s Saturday night, they’re bored, …

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Film Review: The Rezort (2015)

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SYNOPSIS: The ReZort, a post apocalyptic safari, offers paying guests the opportunity to kill zombies in the wake of an outbreak REVIEW: The Rezort—the 2015 British zombie movie directed by Steve Barker—cannot decide which is worse:  heartless corporate greed and opportunism or liberal crusading and do-gooder-ism. So, both are ultimately depicted with equal derision and disdain. And, more importantly for …

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Film Review: Margo (2016)

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SYNOPSIS: A female-driven, post-society drama/thriller about love, madness, and humankind’s everlasting hunt for companionship. REVIEW: Having been produced by the Blaquefyre Independent Film Festival – a grassroots organization that brings art to small communities – Margo wears its indie film credentials on its sleeve from minute one. It’s more arthouse than it is horror. Written by Matthew Packman, this is …

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Film Review: Holidays (2016)

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SYNOPSIS: A new horror anthology that explores different holidays such as Christmas, Halloween, Valentine’s Day, and several others, all with some sort of twisted and warped theme. REVIEW: When I first heard about Holidays I was pretty excited and thought that it sounded like it could be quite awesome.  I’m a sucker for anthologies (though I will admit that recently …

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Film Review: Lo-Fi Gorgon (2016)

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SYNOPSIS: short horror piece about madness and revenge. REVIEW: Another short film for you, kiddies! Today we have LO FI GORGON from Independant Showgirl Films. The film was written and directed by Zane Smith and stars Jessica Heltz. I couldn’t find much information about the film, the filmmaker, or the actor. I did find a page concerning the production company …

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Film Review: Smalltown USA (short film) (2010)

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SYNOPSIS: When Sean and Kelly can’t find their campsite, they are relieved to stumble into the quintessential All-American town.Until they meet the welcoming committee. REVIEW: Ok more short films, folks! Today we have SMALLTOWN USA, which appears to be a truly independant production. No IMDB listings, no websites, nothing at all. But I did learn that the film was written …

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Film Review: The Ones Below (2015)

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SYNOPSIS: After giving birth to her first child, a woman (Clémence Poésy) starts to believe that her downstairs neighbors have sinister intentions. REVIEW: The Ones Below is a slow burn. No, strike that. The Ones Below is a leisurely, gradual, protracted, dawdling, painstakingly slow burn. In fact, it burns about as slowly as anything could possibly burn. It doesn’t spark, …

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Film Review: Viral (2016)

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SYNOPSIS: A young woman (Analeigh Tipton) and her family try to survive a viral outbreak that leads to a quarantine. (source Google – as IMDB’s is misleading) REVIEW: First and foremost, let me get this off my chest; VIRAL is, in no way whatsoever, about a virus. SHOCKED?! Well you shouldn’t be. Anyone with a modicum of sentience or sight …

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Film Review: Vamp (1986)

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SYNOPSIS: A couple of college students take a trip to a sleazy strip joint to acquire the services of one of the dancers. It doesn’t take long for a night of pleasure to turn into a night of vampire bloodlust. REVIEW: Death by Stiletto Heel… and that’s only the beginning of it. This wacky 80’s romp feels like a combination …

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Film Review: World Of The Dead: The Zombie Diaries 2 (2011)

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SYNOPSIS: Three months have passed since a viral outbreak wiped out 99.9% of the world’s population, turning its victims into flesh-eating living dead. In the UK, a surviving band of soldiers and civilians have taken refuge at a rural military barracks. Life in this new world is tough and brutal, but hope appears when a high level communication is received …

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