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Rob Getz

Rob Getz was born poor and ugly in rural Michigan to a horror fanatic father and an incredibly good sport of a mother. He and his younger siblings spent countless weekend evenings ushered off in their pajamas by their parents to a local drive-in movie theater, where they were assured to be completely unconscious before the opening credits of the second film were finished rolling. Rob vaguely recalls these blurred images launching such classics as Ridley Scott's "Alien" and "The Changeling" through drooping eyelids. As he became older, he took the initiative nobody else in the Getz household had the moxie nor the energy to attempt and learned how to program their antiquated V.C.R. to record heavily edited horror films from one of the four available channels. Without these nocturnal bootlegs, there would have been no youthful introduction to the likes of "Re-Animator" or "Eraserhead." Rob wanted to be a part of this twisted universe from those days forward, regardless of the role he played. The tiniest, most insignificant cog in a machine is truly happy if it adores the machine. Even a critic.

Film Review: The Last Days on Mars (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: A group of astronaut explorers succumb one by one to a mysterious and terrifying force while collecting specimens on Mars. REVIEW: Our little red neighbor residing just over the fence at 34 million miles away has been poorly represented in film since Arnold saved the mutants in 1990’s “Total Recall.”  Even denying the pointless remake’s existence, you’re still left ...

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Film Review: We Are What We Are (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: The Parkers, a reclusive family who follow ancient customs, find their secret existence threatened as a torrential downpour moves into their area, forcing daughters Iris and Rose to assume responsibilities beyond those of a typical family REVIEW: Jim Mickle impresses more with each cinematic endeavor.  His first feature as a writer/director, “Mulberry Street,” made its debut in the 2007 ...

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Film Review: Zodiac (2007)

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SYNOPSIS: A San Francisco cartoonist becomes an amateur detective obsessed with tracking down the Zodiac killer. REVIEW: We’ve all seen the title card before.  Looming ominously on the silver screen, rarely ever a harbinger of the latest feel-good romcom.  In fact, “Based on a true story” (or some interchangeable variation) is usually an indication that there will be murder afoot.  The guidelines ...

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Film Review: The Serpent and the Rainbow (1988)

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SYNOPSIS: An anthropologist goes to Haiti after hearing rumors about a drug used by black magic practitioners to turn people into zombies. REVIEW: Wade Davis, a Harvard-educated anthropologist, traveled to Haiti in the early eighties to research the Vodou religion and its practices.  His specific focus was concentrated on zombies, and the assortment of ingredients utilized in creating the poisonous powder that transforms a ...

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Film Review: Demon (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: FBI Special Agent Nicole Diaz is sent to the town of Oro Negro to solve several bizarre murders. At first, it’s thought the killings are random acts committed by smugglers or drug dealers until the Tribal Ranger realizes the bodies have been drained of blood and suspects it is something more. REVIEW: I would much rather deal with the incompetence of ...

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Film Review: Self Storage (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: The friends of a night watchman, at a highly secured self storage facility, are home from college and looking to party. REVIEW: I’ve always maintained a soft spot for Eric Roberts.  From the onset of his career in forgotten classics like “The Pope of Greenwich Village” and “Runaway Train,” he’s always possessed a gift for portraying amiable nuts.  Pushing sixty, ...

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Film Review: Unsolved (2009)

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SYNOPSIS: Fifteen years after an on campus murder, students re-open the case for a class and uncover a truth more horrifying and closer to home than they ever imagined. REVIEW: Murder mysteries are something of a hard sell.  These days, the standard “Whodunnit?” template is rarely utilized as more than a springboard for creative invention.  Both 2000’s “Memento” and “Brick” from ...

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Film Review: The Bell Witch Haunting (2013)

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SYNOPSIS: Based on true events. The Robertson County Sheriff’s Department has released footage found on the bodies of the Sawyer family’s cell phones and video cameras. What was first thought to be a murder-suicide is now believed to be the return of a centuries-old demon responsible for America’s most famous paranormal event REVIEW: Considering the multitude of titles that have surfaced ...

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Film Review: Sawney: Flesh Of Man (2012)

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SYNOPSIS: Religious psychopath Sawney stalks Scotland abducting unholy souls for his communion of sacrifices. With his insane family of inbred killers they rape, torture and eat their victims saving the best morsels for a shadowy chained-up figure in their cavernous Highlands lair. As the Missing Persons list rises, investigative crime journalist Hamish MacDonald writes sensational and damming headlines against the ...

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