Author Archives: Nigel Honeybone

Film Review: Sewer Chewer (2010)

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SYNOPSIS: “Sewer Chewer is a tribute to the creature features of the seventies and eighties drive-in movies. A space satellite falls to earth and lands in a rural area, radiating the local wildlife into a mutant monster that has a large appetite for humans. An unnamed government agency sends a special agent out to dispose of the satellite and the mutant and any who know of it.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: I watched Sewer Chewer (2010) … Continue reading

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Film Review: Screamers (1995)

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SYNOPSIS: “Sirius 6B – year 2078. On a distant mining planet ravaged by a decade of war, scientists have created the perfect weapon: a blade-wielding, self-replicating race of killing devices known as Screamers designed for one purpose only – to hunt down and destroy all enemy life forms. But man’s greatest weapon has continued to evolve without any human guidance, and now it has devised a new mission: to obliterate all life. Colonel Hendricksson is … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Satanic Rites Of Dracula (1973)

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SYNOPSIS: “In London in the seventies, Scotland Yard police investigators think they have uncovered a case of vampirism. They call in an expert vampire researcher named Van Helsing (a descendant of the great vampire-hunter himself, no less) to help them put a stop to these hideous crimes. It becomes apparent that the culprit is Count Dracula himself, disguised as a reclusive property developer, but secretly plotting to unleash a fatal virus upon the world.” (courtesy … Continue reading

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Film Review: Santa Claus Conquers The Martians (1964)

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SYNOPSIS: “Martians, upset that their children have become obsessed with television shows from Earth which promote the virtues of Santa Claus, start an expedition to Earth to kidnap the one and only Santa. While on Earth, they kidnap two lively children that lead the group of Martians to the North Pole and Santa. The Martians then take Santa and the two children back to Mars with them. Voldar, a particularly grumpy Martian, attempts to do … Continue reading

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Samurai Jack (TV series)

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The nineties was the breakthrough decade for television cartoons. While The Simpsons might have brought some long-overdue respect to prime-time animation, Cartoon Network and Comedy Network viewers are likely to be the only ones to truly realise the extent of the weird and wonderful stuff going on in television animation, since Ren And Stimpy brought gross-out gags, psychological torture and retro-styled artwork back into vogue two decades ago. Whilst the limited budgets and tight deadlines … Continue reading

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Film Review: Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

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SYNOPSIS: “Rosemary and Guy Woodhouse move into an apartment in a building with a bad reputation. They discover that their neighbours are a very friendly elderly couple named Roman and Minnie Castevet, and Guy begins to spend a lot of time with them. Strange things start to happen: A woman Rosemary meets in the washroom dies a mysterious death, Rosemary has strange dreams and hears strange noises and Guy becomes remote and distant. Then Rosemary … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Roly Poly Man (1994)

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SYNOPSIS: “This remarkable little film is a wonderful homage to the talents of the late Paul Chubb, who for once was able to showcase his ability as the lead in a feature film. He’s private detective Dirk Trent, a collector of cigarette butts, a ‘smooth’ ladies man, a wearer of bad suits, and he’s convinced there’s more to an incident he caught on tape, where a man seemed about to murder his mistress with an … Continue reading

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Roger Corman Tackles Edgar Allan Poe

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When the cinema of horror was temporarily abandoned in the late fifties, it was mostly low-budget black-and-white films about monsters. At the beginning of the sixties the budgets were lower than ever, but everything else was changing. As monsters flew out the window, doomed neurotics were plodding hauntedly through the door. The day of the Gothic Costume Drama had arrived, and its prophet was a brisk young fellow named Roger Corman. The Gothic was a … Continue reading

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Film Review: Robot Monster (1953)

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SYNOPSIS: “Ro-Man, an alien that looks remarkably like a gorilla in a diving helmet, has destroyed all but six people on the planet Earth. He spends the entire film trying to finish off these survivors, but complications arise when he falls for the young woman in the group.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: I’ve been up to my coccyx in letters asking for more apocalyptic End-Of-The-World cinematic experiences. At least I think that’s what they were asking … Continue reading

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Robert Altman

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Robert Altman, the director of M*A*S*H (1970), Nashville (1975) and Gosford Park (2001), is not an easy artist to summarise. He has always been a fiercely unpredictable ‘lone wolf’ (like many of his heroes) in the film business. But surprisingly, the one category in relation to his work is seldom discussed is the fantastic. Yet at least five of Bob’s films are indubitably fantasy, and he himself once told me “All these films of mine … Continue reading

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Robby The Robot

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For over fifty years Robby The Robot has remained one of the most famous and widely recognised movie robots of all time. Making his film debut in Forbidden Planet (1956), he went on to star in The Invisible Boy (1957) and later forged a lengthy career in television, guest starring in The Thin Man, Lost In Space, The Twilight Zone, The Addams Family, Ark II, The Love Boat, Columbo, Mork And Mindy, and Clueless. Based … Continue reading

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Real Queens Of Scream

Queens Of Scream Fay Wray 1

A Scream Queen is an actress who has become associated with horror films, either through an appearance in a notable entry in the genre, as a frequent victim, or through constant appearances as the female protagonist. She belongs to the Damsel-In-Distress family of fictional characters. Long before the term was invented, the Scream Queen has always been a classic figure in world literature, art and film. She is almost inevitably a young nubile woman, who … Continue reading

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Ray Harryhausen

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The most famous animated creature in film history was King Kong (1933), built and manipulated by Willis O’Brien. A decade later O’Brien was working on another giant ape movie called Mighty Joe Young (1946) and hired a young assistant, Ray Harryhausen. During the fifties it became clear that Harryhausen had inherited O’Brien’s mantle as the top stop-motion animator in the film business, a position which, in the eyes of many, he continues to hold. Stop-motion … Continue reading

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Interview: Ralph Baker as Deadly Earnest

Shane Porteous, Ralph Baker, Ian Bannerman, Hedley Cullen 1

Way back in the sixties, way before Elvira, a favourite amongst Australian students was Deadly Earnest, the television schlock horror host on the 0-10 Network. Late on Friday nights, the atrocious old science fiction and horror films became compulsory viewing, solely because of the gothic Master of Ceremonies. Actors portraying Deadly Earnest were: Ralph Baker (ATV-0 Melbourne); Ian Bannerman (TEN-10 Sydney); Hedley Cullen (SAS-10 Adelaide); and Shane Porteous (TVQ-0 Brisbane). Ralph Baker played the role … Continue reading

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Film Review: Quatermass And The Pit (1968)

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SYNOPSIS: “Workers excavating at an underground station in London uncover the skeletal remains of ancient apes with large skulls. Further digging reveals what is at first believed to be an unexploded German bomb from World War II. Missile expert Colonel Breen is brought in to investigate, accompanied by Professor Bernard Quatermass. When the interior of the ‘missile’ is exposed, a dead locust-like creature that resembles the devil is found. It is determined by Quatermass that … Continue reading

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Film Review: Prisoners Of The Lost Universe (1983)

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SYNOPSIS: “Through a series of coincidences, Carrie, Dan and Doctor Hartmann all fall through a teleporter device Hartmann has invented. Transported to a what appears to be a prehistoric world in a parallel universe and unable to find the Doctor, Dan and Carrie must figure out a way to get back home. Before they can do that, however, they must deal with tribes of savage cavemen, as well as brutal warlord named Kleel who has … Continue reading

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About Nigel Honeybone

Wee Willie"Nigel Honeybone's debut was as Hamlet's dead father, portraying him as a tall posh skeleton. This triumph was followed in Richard III, as the remains of a young prince which he interpreted as a tall posh skeleton. He began attracting starring roles. Henry VIII was scaled down to suit Honeybone's very personalised view of this famous king. Honeybone suggested that perhaps he really was quite skeletal, quite tall, and quite posh. MacBeth, Shylock and Othello followed, all played as tall, skeletal and posh, respectively. Considering his reputation for playing tall English skeletons, many believed that the real Honeybone inside to be something very different, like a squat hunchback perhaps. Interestingly enough, Honeybone did once play a squat hunchback, but it was as a tall posh skeleton. But he was propelled into the film world when, in Psycho (1960), he wore women's clothing for the very first time. The seed of an idea was planted and, after working with director Ed Wood for five years, he realised the unlimited possibilities of tall posh skeletons who dressed in women's clothing. He went on to wear women's clothing in thirteen major motion pictures, including the Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) and Star Wars (1977), heartbreaking as the remains of Aunt Beru. With the onslaught of special effects came the demise of real actors in these sorts of roles. After modeling for CGI skeletons in Total Recall (1990) and Toys (1992), the only possible step forward for a tall posh skeleton was television, imparting his knowledge and expertise of the arts. As well as writing for the world's best genre news website HORROR NEWS, Nigel Honeybone is currently signed to star in a new series for television presenting the finest examples of B-grade horror. THE SCHLOCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW is seen on Friday nights at 10.30pm on TVS Television Sydney, and where ever good Youtube downloads are available." (Fantales candy wrapper circa 2007)