Author Archives: Nigel Honeybone

Film Review: Moon Of The Wolf (1972)

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SYNOPSIS: “After several locals are viciously murdered, a Louisiana sheriff starts to suspect he may be dealing with a werewolf.” (thanks to IMDB for that detailed synopsis) REVIEW: This week I have a film that has never been shown in a cinema anywhere in the world. Never at a drive-in. Never on a double-bill with Plan Nine From Outer Space (1959), not even as a National Lampoon direct-to-DVD movie. You’re excited, I know, you’re thinking … Continue reading

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Film Review: Monsters, Inc. (2001)

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SYNOPSIS: “James P. Sullivan and Mike Wazowski pick up their paychecks at Monsters Incorporated, the utility company that generates energy from the goose bumps of children. Sulley, the Number One scream-generator at the plant accidentally lets in a little girl into the monster world. Since monsters are actually terrified of children it’s a major cause for alarm and a major headache for Sulley and Mike.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: Every kid knows there are monsters. Whether … Continue reading

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Film Review: Manos The Hands Of Fate (1966)

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SYNOPSIS: “A family driving through a small town gets lost and winds up at a backwoods shack managed by Torgo, who takes care of it while The Master is away. The Master worships Manos, an evil deity, and he also wears a neat cape. When Torgo lets the family stay, The Master awakens and does mean stuff like burning off Torgo’s hand and sicking his dog on the family pet. Meanwhile, The Master’s wives wrestle … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Mad Monster (1942)

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SYNOPSIS: “Doctor Cameron has succeeded in his experiments with a serum which will turn a man into a wolf-like monster, and is ready to avenge himself on the men who caused his professional failure. He uses it on his gardener Petro and one after the other is killed by his creation. His daughter, Lenora, grows suspicious and confides with newspaper reporter Tom Gregory.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: This week I have a rare film for you, … Continue reading

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Film Review: Logan’s Run (1976)

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SYNOPSIS: “Logan, a Sandman, is forced to search for Sanctuary – a place to which people have apparently escaped from the sealed city of the future in which he lives. Jessica is caught up along the way and becomes his companion fugitive as they are both pursued by Francis, a fellow Sandman. Sanctuary is not what they expect.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: Welcome to the Twenty-Third Century – seventies style! Here, beneath massive domes, a sprawling … Continue reading

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Living Dolls

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My old friend Sigmund Freud claimed that most children fantasise about dolls coming to life, and psychologist Ernst Jentsch theorised that uncanny feelings arise when there is an intellectual uncertainty about whether an object is alive or not, and also when an object that one knows to be inanimate resembles a living being enough to generate confusion about its nature. Robot engineer Masahiro Mori expanded on Freud and Jentsch’s theories to develop the ‘Uncanny Valley’ … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Little Shop Of Horrors (1960)

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SYNOPSIS: “Seymour is a young man who works in a flower store. He manages to create a carnivorous plant that feeds on human flesh. Nobody knows about it, so Seymour and the plant become ‘good friends’. The plant needs food to grow up, so it convinces him to start killing people.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: This week I wish to discuss the second film in my Charles B. Griffith retrospective, and his greatest contribution to the … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Last Woman On Earth (1960)

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SYNOPSIS: “Rich man Harold Gern (Antony Carbone), busy making money and spending it just as fast, is newly married with Evelyn (Betsy Jones-Moreland) and on his honeymoon in Puerto Rico. His lawyer Martin Joyce (Robert Towne) is there too on business to try and get him out of a situation with the government. Harold gambles a lot and one day decide to deal with the lawyer by going fishing and scuba diving. The three go … Continue reading

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Larry Cohen

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There is plenty of room for argument about director Larry Cohen. His films, when mentioned at all, tend to be dismissed as the lowest kind of hack work. It’s Alive (1973), one of the most successful films of its year at the box-office, appears in a book called The Best, Worst And Most Unusual Horror Films by Darrell W. Moore. It’s in the ‘Worst’ chapter, and is awarded one star out of ten – I’d … Continue reading

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Film Review: Lady Frankenstein (1971)

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SYNOPSIS: “When Doctor Frankenstein is killed by a monster he created, his daughter and his lab assistant Marshall continue his experiments. The two fall in love and attempt to transplant Marshall’s brain in to the muscular body of a retarded servant Stephen, in order to prolong the aging Marshall’s life. Meanwhile, the first monster seeks revenge on the grave robbers who sold the body parts used in its creation to Doctor Frankenstein. Soon it comes … Continue reading

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Film Review: King Kong (1933)

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SYNOPSIS: “In 1933, the bold and successful filmmaker Carl Denham travels by ship with a large crew, his friend Jack Driscoll and the starlet Ann Darrow to an unknown island to shoot a movie. The local natives worship a huge gorilla called Kong and they abduct Ann to offer her in a sacrifice to Kong. Jack Driscoll, who is in love with her, Carl Denham, who aims to capture the animal for an exhibition in … Continue reading

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Film Review: Killers From Space (1954)

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SYNOPSIS: “Atomic scientist Doug Martin is missing after his plane crashes on an reconnaissance mission after a nuclear test. Miraculously appearing unhurt at the base later, he is given sodium amethol, but authorities are skeptical of his story that he was captured by aliens determined to conquer the Earth with giant monsters and insects. Martin vows to use existing technology to destroy them.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: Though hardly a household name these days, Billy Wilder … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Killer Shrews (1959)

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SYNOPSIS: “Boat Captain Thorne Sherman and his black sidekick, Rook Griswold, arrive to deliver supplies to a remote and isolated island, inhabited by a scientist, his daughter and his aides. Sherman soon learns that the scientist and company have created out-of-control, flesh-eating, monstrous giant shrews. A hurricane hits and all the stranded humans become either meals for or meal-targets for the shrews.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: As the fifties drew to a close so did the … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Keep (1983)

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SYNOPSIS: “Romania, 1942, a detachment of the German Army is sent to guard a mysterious Romanian citadel located on a strategic mountain pass. When soldiers begin to be mysteriously murdered, the SS arrives to deal with what is thought to be partisan activity. What the SS finds, however, is an evil force trapped within The Keep and a force which will do anything in order to escape.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: He created Miami Vice (2006), … Continue reading

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Film Review: Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter (1966)

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SYNOPSIS: “Legendary outlaw of the Old West Jesse James, on the run from Marshal MacPhee, hides out in the castle of Baron Frankenstein’s granddaughter Maria, who proceeds to transform Jesse’s slow-witted pal Hank into a bald zombie, which she names Igor.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: This week’s public domain nugget is a little anti-classic with the self-explanatory title of Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter (1966). Yes, you heard right, I’m discussing a western, make no bones … Continue reading

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Film Review: Juggernaut (1936)

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SYNOPSIS: “Doctor Victor Sartorius, a dedicated but dying medical researcher working in Morocco, becomes frustrated when his funding is cut off and his experiments ended. He is approached by Lady Yvonne Clifford, the young and beautiful wife of wealthy but aging aristocrat Sir Charles Clifford. She has been carrying on an affair with a gold-digging army captain and offers Sartorius the 20,000 pounds he needs to continue his research if he will become her husband’s … Continue reading

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Jacques Tourneur

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There were some good but usually fairly conventional fantasies produced by the commercial cinema in the forties. But in the middle of all this was one small oasis of the unusual: The low-budget low-key horror movies produced by Val Lewton for RKO Radio Pictures between 1942 and 1945, and made by a small, fairly autonomous unit, saving money where possible by using little-known contract actors and already existing studio sets. Val Lewton worked with three … Continue reading

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To See The Invisible Man

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Scientific knowledge was never one of the requirements needed for a successful Hollywood scriptwriter. At least science fiction authors are usually aware of scientific flaws and try to disguise them with pseudo-science. For instance, they’ve long got around Einstein’s law regarding the impossibility of faster-than-light travel by taking a short-cut through ‘hyper-space’. My old friend H.G. Wells was well aware of the fact that a totally transparent man would also be totally blind, since the … Continue reading

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Film Review: Horrors Of Spider Island (1960)

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SYNOPSIS: “En route to a show in Singapore, a troupe of beautiful dancers are stranded on a deserted island by a plane crash. Their routine of skinny-dipping and devising new skimpy outfits is interrupted when a radioactive spider bites their manager and turns him into a wild-eyed, furry-faced monster with three fangs and a passion for strangling.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: Witness, if you dare, a handful of girls enslaved by a diabolical human beast on … Continue reading

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Film Review: Heavenly Creatures (1994)

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SYNOPSIS: “Based on the true story of Juliet Hulme and Pauline Parker, two close friends who share a love of fantasy and literature, who conspire to kill Pauline’s mother when she tries to end the girls’ intense and obsessive relationship.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: From the time of Oedipus Rex by Sophocles to the more recent Menendez brothers and O.J. Simpson, crimes of the heart are deemed the most evil in nature, yet are always the … Continue reading

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How To ‘Make’ A Monster

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How does one identify a monster? The question is easier to answer by example than definition. In movie terms, a monster is something unnatural, dangerous and out of control. King Kong (1933), the Frankenstein (1931) monster, Godzilla (1954), Dracula (1931), Ray Harryhausen’s cyclops from The Seventh Voyage Of Sinbad (1958), the Alien (1979), The Mummy (1932). That’s the monster A-list, but gobbling along in their wake are the tentacled, radioactive invaders of the fifties – … Continue reading

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About Nigel Honeybone

Wee Willie"Nigel Honeybone's debut was as Hamlet's dead father, portraying him as a tall posh skeleton. This triumph was followed in Richard III, as the remains of a young prince which he interpreted as a tall posh skeleton. He began attracting starring roles. Henry VIII was scaled down to suit Honeybone's very personalised view of this famous king. Honeybone suggested that perhaps he really was quite skeletal, quite tall, and quite posh. MacBeth, Shylock and Othello followed, all played as tall, skeletal and posh, respectively. Considering his reputation for playing tall English skeletons, many believed that the real Honeybone inside to be something very different, like a squat hunchback perhaps. Interestingly enough, Honeybone did once play a squat hunchback, but it was as a tall posh skeleton. But he was propelled into the film world when, in Psycho (1960), he wore women's clothing for the very first time. The seed of an idea was planted and, after working with director Ed Wood for five years, he realised the unlimited possibilities of tall posh skeletons who dressed in women's clothing. He went on to wear women's clothing in thirteen major motion pictures, including the Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) and Star Wars (1977), heartbreaking as the remains of Aunt Beru. With the onslaught of special effects came the demise of real actors in these sorts of roles. After modeling for CGI skeletons in Total Recall (1990) and Toys (1992), the only possible step forward for a tall posh skeleton was television, imparting his knowledge and expertise of the arts. As well as writing for the world's best genre news website HORROR NEWS, Nigel Honeybone is currently signed to star in a new series for television presenting the finest examples of B-grade horror. THE SCHLOCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW is seen on Friday nights at 10.30pm on TVS Television Sydney, and where ever good Youtube downloads are available." (Fantales candy wrapper circa 2007)