Author Archives: Nigel Honeybone

Film Review: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

SYNOPSIS: “Shipping magnate Karl Stromberg has employed two brilliant scientists to develop a submarine tracking system. Once it is finished, he assures them of multi-million-dollar payouts to their Swiss bank accounts, but not before ruthlessly murdering his young assistant by dumping her into a tank inhabited by a man-eating tiger shark. Shortly afterward, British and Soviet submarines vanish while on routine moves, and Bond is called into action. Also called to duty is his Soviet … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Fall Of The House Of Usher (1960)

SYNOPSIS: “After a long journey, Philip arrives at the Usher mansion seeking his loved one, Madeline. Upon arriving, however, he discovers that Madeline and her brother Roderick Usher have been afflicted with a mysterious malady: Roderick’s senses have become painfully acute, while Madeline has become catatonic. That evening, Roderick tells his guest of an old Usher family curse: any time there has been more than one Usher child, all of the siblings have gone insane … Continue reading

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Film Review: Mesa Of Lost Women (1953)

Mesa Of Lost Women poster 1

SYNOPSIS: “A mad scientist named Aranya is creating giant spiders and dwarfs in his lab on Zarpa Mesa in Mexico. He wants to create a master race of superwomen by injecting his female subjects with spider venom.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: This week’s endearing endurance test is set south of the border – not Melbourne but Mexico – where a scientist and his diminutive dwarves are super-sizing spiders in their spare time. The rest of the … Continue reading

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Film Review: Zombie Brigade (1986)

SYNOPSIS: “When an amusement park is built on the grounds of an old cemetery, the dead rise to take revenge.” (courtesy IMDB) REVIEW: Zombies! The flesh-hungry undead have been a mainstay in mythology dating back to the original epic of Gilgamesh, in which Ishtar threatens to open the gates of the Netherworld releasing the dead to eat the living. The first film to exploit the word was White Zombie (1932), starring my favourite Hungarian ham … Continue reading

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Film Review: Just Imagine (1930)

SYNOPSIS: “New York, 1980: airplanes have replaced cars, numbers have replaced names, pills have replaced food, government-arranged marriages have replaced love, and test tube babies have replaced – well, you get the idea. Scientists revive a man struck by lightning in 1930 and he is rechristened ‘Single O’. He is befriended by J-21, who can’t marry the girl of his dreams because he isn’t ‘distinguished’ enough, until he is chosen for a four-month expedition to … Continue reading

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Film Review: Men In Black II (2002)

SYNOPSIS: “In 1978, a race of aliens came to Earth and asked the MIB to help protect their greatest treasure which they call ‘The Light’ which is a source of awesome power. But it’s not in their mandate to do that so they tell them they can’t and send them away. But in the present day, Serleeena an alien who wants the light comes to Earth because she suspects that the MIB did hide it. … Continue reading

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Film Review: Men In Black (1997)

SYNOPSIS: “Based on the comic book. Unbeknownst to other people, there is a private agency code named MiB. This agency is some kind of extra terrestrial surveillance corporation. Then, one of the agency’s finest men only going by the name ‘K’ is recruiting for a new addition to the agency. He has chosen James Edwards of the NYPD. Then, one day, a flying saucer crashes into Earth. This was an alien a part of the … Continue reading

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Nigel Honeybone Goes To The Drive-In!

I’m awfully proud to announce a rather exciting event taking place in Sydney, Australia at the Skyline Drive-In Blacktown, Friday the 13th of June at 6pm, only AUS$10 a skull…I mean head (all profits go to Westmead Children’s Hospital) for my very special presentation of the Australian premieres of Christopher R. Mihm‘s The Giant Spider (2013) plus The Late Night Double Feature (2014)! Do you miss the old-fashioned fun of piling bodies into the car … Continue reading

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Film Review: The Fifth Element (1997)

SYNOPSIS: “In the twenty-third century, the universe is threatened by evil. The only hope for mankind is the Fifth Element, who comes to Earth every five thousand years to protect the humans with four stones of the four elements: fire, water, earth and air. A Mondoshawan spacecraft is bringing the fifth element back to Earth but it is destroyed by the evil Mangalores. However, a team of scientists use the DNA of the remains of … Continue reading

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Film Review: Island Of Lost Souls (1932)

SYNOPSIS: “After his ship goes down, Edward Parker is rescued at sea. Parker gets into a fight with Captain Davies of the Apia and the Captain tosses him overboard while making a delivery to the tiny tropical island of Doctor Moreau. Parker discovers that Moreau has good reason to be so secretive on his lonely island. The doctor is a whip-cracking task master to a growing population of his own gruesome human/animal experiments. He does … Continue reading

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Film Review: Sunset Boulevard (1950)

SYNOPSIS: “In Hollywood of the fifties, the obscure screenplay writer Joe Gillis is not able to sell his work to the studios, is full of debts and is thinking in returning to his hometown to work in an office. While trying to escape from his creditors, he has a flat tire and parks his car in a decadent mansion in Sunset Boulevard. He meets the owner and former silent-movie star Norma Desmond, who lives alone … Continue reading

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Film Review: Jurassic Park (1993)

SYNOPSIS: “On Isla Nublar, a new park has just been built with genetically engineered dinosaurs. Tragedy strikes when one of the workers is killed by a velociraptor. The founder of the park John Hammond (Richard Attenborough) requests paleontologist Doctor Alan Grant (Sam Neill) and his assistant, Doctor Ellie Sattler (Laura Dern) to come to the park and ensure that it is safe. Also joining them are Hammond’s lawyer Donald Gennaro (Martin Ferrero) and chaos theorist … Continue reading

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Film Review: Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs (1937)

SYNOPSIS: “A beautiful girl, Snow White, takes refuge in the forest in the house of seven dwarfs to hide from her stepmother, the wicked Queen. The Queen is jealous because she wants to be known as the fairest in the land, and Snow White’s beauty surpasses her own. The dwarfs grow to love their unexpected visitor, who cleans their house and cooks their meals. But one day while the dwarfs are at their diamond mine, … Continue reading

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New horror-comedy DROP BEARS now in pre-production!

What is missing from the horror-comedy genre? We’ve already had a virtual menagerie of films about sharks, birds, fish, dinosaurs, spiders, snakes, sheep, rats, etc. What’s missing from this enormous list of comedy-horror animals are Killer Koalas, or Drop Bears as we call them here in Australia, but with your help we can fill this latent gap. Drop Bears: Attack! Of The Killer Koalas is intended to be an action-packed horror-comedy from writer-director Stephen Banham … Continue reading

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Film Review: Kind Hearts And Coronets (1949)

SYNOPSIS: “Louis Mazzini’s mother’s frequent tales of how her titled D’Ascoyne family shunned her after she eloped with an Italian commoner causes a simmering resentment in him. On being spurned because of his lowly status by his lifetime (if devious and fickle) sweetheart Sibella he decides to permanently remove all the D’Ascoynes standing between him and the Dukedom. Becoming romantically involved with one of the widows he has created, he finds Sibella’s jealousy could seriously … Continue reading

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Film Review: Rocketship X-M (1950)

SYNOPSIS: “Space scientists Doctor Ralph Fleming and Doctor Karl Eckstrom conceive the first manned space flight ‘Rocketship eXpedition Moon’. Eckstrom crews the ship with his brilliant protegĂ© Doctor Lisa Van Horn, astronomer Harry Chamberlain and engineer Major William Corrigan under pilot Captain Floyd Graham. After a successful launch, the mission goes awry, as the crew are hurled across space and past the moon by a rocket malfunction, to land instead on the planet Mars. Encouraged … Continue reading

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About Nigel Honeybone

Wee Willie"Nigel Honeybone's debut was as Hamlet's dead father, portraying him as a tall posh skeleton. This triumph was followed in Richard III, as the remains of a young prince which he interpreted as a tall posh skeleton. He began attracting starring roles. Henry VIII was scaled down to suit Honeybone's very personalised view of this famous king. Honeybone suggested that perhaps he really was quite skeletal, quite tall, and quite posh. MacBeth, Shylock and Othello followed, all played as tall, skeletal and posh, respectively. Considering his reputation for playing tall English skeletons, many believed that the real Honeybone inside to be something very different, like a squat hunchback perhaps. Interestingly enough, Honeybone did once play a squat hunchback, but it was as a tall posh skeleton. But he was propelled into the film world when, in Psycho (1960), he wore women's clothing for the very first time. The seed of an idea was planted and, after working with director Ed Wood for five years, he realised the unlimited possibilities of tall posh skeletons who dressed in women's clothing. He went on to wear women's clothing in thirteen major motion pictures, including the Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) and Star Wars (1977), heartbreaking as the remains of Aunt Beru. With the onslaught of special effects came the demise of real actors in these sorts of roles. After modeling for CGI skeletons in Total Recall (1990) and Toys (1992), the only possible step forward for a tall posh skeleton was television, imparting his knowledge and expertise of the arts. As well as writing for the world's best genre news website HORROR NEWS, Nigel Honeybone is currently signed to star in a new series for television presenting the finest examples of B-grade horror. THE SCHLOCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW is seen on Friday nights at 10.30pm on TVS Television Sydney, and where ever good Youtube downloads are available." (Fantales candy wrapper circa 2007)