Author Archives: Monster Matt

12 Bad Jokes About ‘My Soul To Take 3D’

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“My Soul To Take 3D“, is the new Wes Craven horror film, about a serial killer coming back to terrorize teens that share the same birthday. Plus, the birthdays are the date the killer was supposedly put to rest. I’m not sure,but I think I feel the need to write 12 Bad Jokes About: “My Soul To Take” Mwhuhuhahahah! 1) What Wes Craven film, has a hockey player arguing with a referee disallowing his goal? … Continue reading

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12 Bad Jokes About District 9

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12 Bad Jokes About District 9 District 9, (2009), directed by Neill Blomkamp, is about a race of aliens living on earth.Unfortunately, they are forced to live in camps or slums.They are treated as a low life form.They get nicknamed “prawns”. The story gets a twist, when a government agent gets exposed to the prawns technology.The way he has to deal with what comes next.(I’m not giving any spoilers). The beautiful thing about this movie, … Continue reading

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12 The Last Exorcism Jokes

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The Last Excorcism, is about a minister reluctantly performing a spirit removal, or excorcism, in front of a film documentary crew. It’s directed by Daniel Stamm, and produced by Eli Roth, among others. 1. What did the minister do , when his subject was possesed by the spirit of Charles Atlas? Performed his “Last Flex-orcism”! 2. What do you call a procedure to remove the spirit of an Ogre, one final time? The “Last Shreks-orcism”! … Continue reading

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12 Pirahna 3D Jokes

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Piranha3D is directed by Alexandre Aja,and will be in theaters this summer(2010). It is the story of prehistoric man-eating fish,getting set free by an underwater earthquake/tremor. A feeding frenzy is to follow, as the little things tear up some springbreakers on a lovely beach! It stars Elizabeth Shue, Eli Roth, Ving Rhames, Christopher Lloyd, Richard Dreyfuss, and more… Let’s test the treacherous waters,with: 12 Bad jokes about Piranha3D!!!!

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12 Dead Snow Jokes!

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The 2009 Norwegian horror/comedy film, Dead Snow, or Dod Sno, is directed by Tommy Wirkola.It centers on med students spending their spring break on a ski trip, in a cabin. What they don’t know, is they are about to be attacked by Nazi Zombies! (It could happen)… I love snow! I love Zombies! Heck, I love movies that vilify Nazis! Let’s get out our sleds, and go downhill with:

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