Haunted Honeymoon

Recipe of Fear

Cooking up a good scare is nothing more than congealing the right ingredients. While some of the best recipes are typically a matter of taste, most will include darkness and solitude as a base. Keep in mind that no formula is the same and while one ingredient may work well in one instance, it may not in another. Therefore, experimentation is highly encouraged, requiring adding a pinch here and taking away a dash there. Don’t be discouraged if originally met with disappointment. There are many flavors to choose from so keep chopping, dicing, slicing and grinding. Eventually your recipe will be tasty and delicious…perfect, something you’ll be proud to serve.

My personal recipe began when I was nine years old when I happened upon my first successful ingredient. Vividly remembering to this day, I savored the delectability as a connoisseur would letting the taste linger. After the feast, my palate couldn’t diffuse the lovely aftertaste and I found myself striving for re-creation. While I’m certain the ingredient has successfully served more than one, I didn’t realize how easy it was to cook up.

The main ingredient was George Romero’s 1968 zombie masterpiece The Night of the Living Dead and as it simmered into a rolling boil, I savored the luscious flavor with certainness, just like those lumbering corpses did with the bloody flesh they obtained.

It was my first real experience of a delicate cuisine that eventually went on to become a taste consistently strived for but many times met with dismal failure. None-the-less, using various condiments and seasonings, I didn’t give up and continued the quest for the perfect recipe. Little did I know that it would take a few more years before I would achieve.

Regardless, while the ingredient offered a completely different essence, the finished product was just as tasty and maybe even more so. The combination of a heaping scoop of isolation rapidly mixed with two cups of witching hour gloom meshed perfectly, creating a deep rich flavor. As the lingering aroma wafted, it was probably this chef’s finest hour. What was the ingredient? The Exorcist. Note: having since obtained the uncut version, the outcome seems to have a slightly more delicate flavor, but is most certainly just as delicious.

So, what will be your best flavors? Like previously mentioned, this is all a matter of discrimination. As with all good banquets, beginning with a good base is the key. Through personal trial and error, I have listed below a wonderful start. Build on it. Find your palate.

Begin with a big heaping bowl of calling on the neighborhood movie rental store. It’s no different that visiting a grocery store. Keep in mind that in order to select the absolute best ingredients one must put some preliminary thought into it. Sweet or sour, rich and creamy or bland and boring will bear completely within your selection. Search carefully. Take your time. Dig deep. Some of the best flavors are buried below the top row.

Mix in a liberal amount of darkness.

Throw in a heaping quantity of solitude. (It will inadvertently increase the tang.)

Don’t be shy with the surround sound and toss in more than a little pinch. Consider increasing the volume as needed.

Popcorn always enhances, but don’t expect to finish it and if the recipe is exceptional, expect cleanup to be more than originally expected.

Find a cozy spot, snuggle in and allow the ingredients to simmer and set. Cooking times will vary and usually the impending aroma will aid in knowing when the feast is ready. Note: From experience, a good rule of thumb for serving is when you find that the edge of your seat seems to have become your constant location or finding yourself chronically covering with a blanket or just after turning toward the blackened corner to face that faint little noise you thought you heard.

Eat hearty…

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About Wee Willie Wicked

Wee WillieWith the seeds firmly planted in his mind by Pittsburgh's Chiller Theatre, Thomas Scopel found the weekly scares he desired. After obtaining a degree and working in the engineering field and constantly feeling the writing itch, he pursued it, becoming a correspondent at the Daytona Beach News Journal. This scratched the itch, but left only raised, bloody, horror aspirating welts on his flesh and he converted to horror fiction.

Since entering the macabre he has been published in various horror based publications and his alter ego, an evil clown named Wee Willie Wicked, was born. His tales include: The Pumpkin Patch, Lickety Split, While You Sleep, All the Creatures Were Stirring…Even the Mouse, The Eight Legs of Night, The Argument, A Cup of Sugar, The Horrors of Easter, Don't Forget the Fingers: A Guide to the Perfect Zombie Family Picnic, Welcome, The Christmas Help, and more.

He has written two novellas, Twitch and The Daily Death – How I Killed My Co-Workers In 30 Days, a collection of macabre fictional death tales.

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