Home | Film Reviews | Film Review: Texas Killing Fields (2011)

Film Review: Texas Killing Fields (2011)


In the Texas bayous, a local homicide detective teams up with a cop from New York City to investigate a series of unsolved murders.


LIFE SPOILERS AHEAD THERE IS A LOT OF BAD NEWS IN THIS REVIEW. And by bad news I mean remakes and sequels that you probably didn’t want to know about.

The short version of the story is there is a serial killer in a small town in Texas and two cops go looking for him… Exciting I know.

This is a film that is so down the middle I’d rather kind of not waste time talking about it. I’m not saying it was a bad movie by any means, in fact given a lot of the dreck that is out there it’s a pretty decent film… if you’re into “cop drama.” Yet with my personal feelings towards authority it’s hard for me to care what cops do… And while this film might come off as a bit of a “serial killer film” it ain’t… Or at least it’s not on the “fun side” of serial killer films and I’ll get to that in a minute. This review is going to be a “doo-sea…” however the film is not a do see, unless you have a choice between watching this film and say an Adam Sandler/Mike Myers film…

Okay, at this point in time I think we can safely divide serial killer movies into two types of films, we’ve got the “cop side” and we got the “killer side.” Cop side are films like “Silence of Lambs” and “Zodiac” and well that’s what pops into my head first, these are the movies that are about catching poor helpless serial killers and locking them away or killing them, I mean they are serial killers what have they done wrong? Then you’ve got the serial killer side which are films like “Henry: Portrait of Serial Killer” –great film totally see it or “Monster” –a film that doesn’t really have the kind of hot lesbian action you would expect and despite Charlize Theron and Christina Ricci it’s not hot at all… But what these films have in common is they are from the point of view of the serial killer that is killer side. Serial killer films vary in accuracy but at the same time they are far creepier and more like horror films than the cop side films and the killer side movies are comparatively far more accurate as well, seriously think about it. Jodi Foster is playing an FBI agent yet how many f*cking doughnuts did you see her eat during “Silence of the Lambs?” Not a one, she’s playing a federal agent and feds are like are like super cops, meaning they would need an excessive amount of doughnuts to sustain their super cop power and she doesn’t eat a single f*cking doughnut in the entire film and you mean to tell that film is somehow realistic? OR watch “Seven” again the movie is total bullsh*t, I swear between Brad Pit and Morgan Freeman NOT A SINGLE PIECE OF FUCKING FIRED DOUGH IS EATEN! Not even a Jelly!

The “cop side” of serial killer films are for me a tad more, well, I hate to say it but boring and the “Texas Killing Fields” is a perfect example of a “cop side” serial killer film where no doughnuts are eaten.

Also the film claims to be based on a true story. Nothing bothers me more than when we as an audience are asked to care if a piece of FICTION is based on a true story, but I try watch a film merits on its own without it’s tag lines getting in the way of the art. You know viewing a film as a potential thought provoking, emotional and entertaining experience, not as how it is sold to me. Or who cast in it, even if I really enjoy the actors.

I like Jeffery Dean Morgan, he’s not a great actor but he’s just very charismatic and he really paid his dues. Guy started acting in 1991 and didn’t catch a real break till 2009 as far as his career goes, that’s 18 years of busting his ass as a nobody with sporadic one time roles on various TV shows in Hollywood till he got the role of “The Comedian” in “The Watchmen.” And well, he makes the “Texas Killing Fields” more interesting to watch then if say Chris Hemsworth were in it. But on a sucky note, he loses some points with me because he’s going to be in the upcoming “Red Dawn” remake, this time the propaganda will be aimed at North Koreans, cause I don’t think Russia will be attacking anyone anytime soon. Well I think the other reason it will be about North Korea is cause if we pointed out that Chain is a bigger threat to us then the Chinese might not sell their slave labor goods to Walmart and that would really f*ck up our economy…

Not to get into the politics of the original “Red Dawn” or the fact that I just wrote a review about another propaganda film (and a really good one at that see my “The Devil’s Double” review) but there is NO reason for Red Dawn 1 or 2 to exist other than to dupe people into feeling patriotic… I can give you a million reason to love America without seeing a movie about why we should hate communist. It’s the hate factor that bothers me. Then again I can give the same amount of reasons as to why you should love pepper jack cheese… And I hate to say it but the original “Red Dawn” is a good movie… Even more fun it you get the Rifftrax of it…

But being that this review is just getting started I assure you the connections to upcoming Hollywood diarrhea are going to be huge because the other star of the is Sam Worthington, who is not just a hack of an actor and start of the upcoming “Wrath of the Titans” and “Avatar 2: Electric Booguloo.” Then again I really shouldn’t say that he is a “hack,” Worthington isn’t a bad actor, he’s just kind of “there.” You know like roads and sidewalks are just kind of there and they don’t stand out…

Now I know I’ve wrote a lot about everything in the world here BUT the “Texas Killing Fields” but it’s hard, because the movie is really just an extended episode o f “N.Y.P.D Blue” but shot in a Texas sort of way… I guess it might feel that way because the director of the film Ami Canaan Mann wrote not just a Nancy drew movie but also an episode of “N.Y.P.D. Blue” okay I must relent, “Texas Killing Fields” feel a bit more like “N.C.I.S” or “Criminal Minds” or “Nash Bridges” or just plain old “Magnum P.I.” “Magnum’s”Tom Selleck and Jeffery Dean Morgan both have tremendous mustache power, I really do have to note that. But I think Selleck owns it totally differently…

Now Ami Canaan Mann has a just a touch of nepotism being that her dad is Michael Mann, you know the guy who directed “Thief,” “Manhunter”(–the first movie to have Hannibal Lecter in it,) “Heat,” “Ali,” and was the executive producer on “Miami Vice” both the T.V. show and the director of the movie. So did dad pull strings? I have no f*cking clue, this movie is “just another movie” it’s not terrible… Anyone could have directed it but this isn’t the work of a total f*ck up given a budget and camera. Typcailly those people wind up as actors anyway…

Ultimately, this is a film that needed either a lot more sex, violence, depravity and gore or to just be more stylized… That is one thing that I will say about “Papa Mann” is you watch one of his films and you can tell who is directing it… “Texas Killing Fields” could have been made by any director; there is no stamp of persona on it. I don’t really care if a film is based on a true story or not… But in this case they should have chosen a far more interesting story and to put a little bit of art into it.

So while writing this review every time I had to write the name “Texas Killing Fields” all I could think of was another famous “Texas” movie but it involves chainsaws… Really the hardest part of writing this review was not comparing or referencing Leather Face… But I guess I just did.

Texas Killing Fields (2011)

One comment

  1. This “review” was horror-able. Why waste anyone’s time? The movie couldn’t have been worse than this review.

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